Sleep Pose?

Stole this from NotMiranda...

Find your own pose!

Interesting.... I wonder if that's true about me and Insta-BF...

Day 1... and the L word?

After our lovely night Friday, Saturday the Insta-BF and I spent the day together. He took me to a lovely brunch, and as our drinks came we toasted.

"To Day 1," he said.

"To Day 1." (Okay, can you see why I'm totally smitten with this guy?)

After our lovely brunch, we did all sorts of cute datey things. Caught a movie in Union Square. Browsed The Strand. Basically we couldn't get enough of each other.

At some point, however, Thursday or Friday night, the L-word got put out there. WHAT? Yes, indeed, I'm not sure how, but out it came. I think I said it first, but as soon as I did, Insta-BF jumped on the bandwagon and started saying it too. So Saturday was filled with them. Scary, but when I'm with him, it just feels right, y'kno?

Of course, the second we parted ways, I began to second-guess myself. I've never had a relationship go this quickly, I've always dated the person for at least a month before exclusivity even came up, and the L word? Forget about it. And though when I'm with him, everything seems perfectly perfect, on my own I begin to doubt if any of this is even real.

Somehow, though, Insta-BF knows exactly what I'm thinking. Sunday night we were talking on IM (our standard mode of communication) and I mentioned that if we were still dating in a few months, he'd have to come to see my show.

IBF: Why would you do that? Do you honestly think we won't make it a few months?

No, I replied, but told him what was going on, that when I'm not in his presence I don't even think this is happening. He said he understood.... and that we needed to take the L word off the table. That it needs to be something genuine, something we know to be true, even when we're apart. I agreed.

The next day, just in case there was any confusion, he sent the following email:

Hey you,

I just wanted to actually write you an email -- something a bit more composed and thought out than our various IMs, texts or phone conversations. I suppose it allows me to really sit down, gather my thoughts and compose to you exactly what's on my mind.

You've heard it plenty of times and you will again. I am crazy about you. I find myself flipping over to my LiveJournal to look at the photo of you I posted -- showing you off to all of my friends -- and smiling. I am now thinking of fun events and things I'd like to do, but now in terms of what WE could do together. For instance, in this week's issue of Flavorpill, they mentioned the Cherry Blossom Festival at the Brooklyn Botanical Garden this weekend. They had a trivia contest where you can win a PAIR of tickets. This time around, I had no doubt in my mind who I'd share the second ticket with.

Anyway, that's basically it. Nothing special, nothing too deep. Just wanted to let you know in my own way what you mean to me.

Yours as always,

The Insta-BF

*sigh* I think I easily could be in love with this guy.

Which means I had to do something about Tall Ted....

The Insta-Boyfriend

Okay, so where were we? Oh, yeah, Friday.

Friday was the long awaited blogger party, and was a blast, as usual. In attendance: Polly (that's me!), Dolly, Meg, Mr. Woland and his friend "Ricardo," Homosexual Suspect with roommate Oreo, ActorSerf, Pookalu, Damn It Anyway, Stolie, Sid and friend "Bob," Alpha, and Deep. So much fun, as usual. But since it was a Friday, people took off early for other destinations. As the night wore on, Dolly and I decided to message our boys, MacB and Web Walter, and soon enough they showed up.

What? Invite Web Walter to the blogger gathering you ask? Well, after reading this post, I decided to tell him Thursday night. He's a blogger himself, and it was pretty much a sure thing he'd find it. So, I fessed up. He promised not to go looking for it, though I'm sure if he wants to find it, he will. I have nothing to hide! Ha!

So WW and MacB show up--and Dolly and I are both such smitten kittens. Everyone heads out, and WW wants me to meet up with a few of his friends, so we shift venue, leaving MacB and Dolly alone. At the new bar, I get the thumbs up from WW's friends, and Elle and Downtown Chic show up. Yippee!!! (I love them). We play duck hunter and have a blast.

Cut to the chase--it's late, we're drunk, I go home with WW. We start to fool around, but I remind him of my rule--"I can't sleep with people I'm not exclusive with. Sorry..."

He says "I thought we already agreed on that last night."

Woah. I think I have an Insta-Boyfriend.

Impromptu Date

Dear readers,

Thank you for being patient with me! With rehearsals for all these shows, I barely have had time to breathe, let alone post. And Web Walter has been taking up quite a bit of my time...

So, Thursday. Web Walter messages me during rehearsal, saying he wants to see me. Since my rehearsal is on his way home, he offers to buy me a quick drink for a quick hello. Though I wouldn't normally agree to such things, if I weren't so busy, I would have probably gone out with him Thursday anyway, so I agree.

We meet up and one drink becomes two, which becomes many, which becomes the bar closing. We move to another bar, then that one closes too. But you can't shut the two of us up! We just have so much to say to each other--it's difficult to stop. So we end up sitting on the middle of the sidewalk, talking and kissing till 4:30 am.

On a bathroom break, he sent me the following text message:
"There is no confusion... I am falling in love with you."

Can we say OMG???

Wait till you hear about this weekend....

Smitten

Had an impromptu date 2 with Web Walter last night--he met me after rehearsal and we were out till 4:30. I'm totally smitten. Details to come!

Daily Contact

Tall Ted and Web Walter have both opted for the everyday contact approach (a far cry from the wait 3+ days to contact rule--BTW, the actor who got my # a week and a half ago called last night. What the?).

Web Walter and I now have a nightly IM routine. He's on AIM almost constantly, and when I get home we generally have a sweet conversation. Last night he said he wanted to talk on the phone instead, and we chatted till 3 AM!! It's so easy to talk to him--and I'm most assuredly not a phone person at all, so this was actually quite an accomplishment. He told me that he is smitten with me--and I think I'm getting there with him. We're both eagerly anticipating our date on Saturday.

They both sent text messages to me today at 2:30. I think this is hysterical, because it only highlights the differences between them.

From Tall Ted: "Just sayin' hi. Hope you're enjoying this gorgeous day outside. I'm stuck in the office. I want ice cream but can't leave because of meetings and work. It sucks."

From Web Walter: a cute photo of him smiling at me (no, not an anatomy shot! Dirty minds...) with the caption "pour vous"

Since I'm feeling more and more smitten with Web Walter myself, I think I have to do something about the Tall Ted situation. He's also adorable, a gentleman, totally sweet. But I don't seem to have quite the connection I have with Web Walter. We don't have a scheduled third date yet (though not from lack of trying on his part), so I think, depending on how things go on Saturday, I may have to shoot an uncomfortable email his way. Though I was debating making stuff up, I think the truth is the best way to go. Something like:

Though you're one of the most amazing guys I've ever met, I don't think I can continue seeing you romantically. Right around our first date, I had another first date with someone that I seem to really connect with--and I have to pursue it. Which really sucks, because I'm totally attracted to you and think you're an amazing catch. Just my luck--no guys in my life for months, and now two? Typical.

Anyway, I didn't want to let things go any further like this--it's always the sooner the better with these things, and you're too great a guy for me to pull the fade. If you're interested in being friends, I'd love to take you out to lunch (or go dancing!), but if not, I totally understand.

Is that too much? I know I'm being a bit premature, but this is weighing heavily on my mind...

Dating Dilemma

So, dear readers, it appears I have a dating dilemma. After my lovely date with Web Walter on Saturday, I was leaning toward canceling my second date with Tall Ted (I've adopted Dolly's nomenclature for these purposes...). But it seemed too late, so I kept the date.

And had a lovely date with Tall Ted.

Tall Ted was the perfect gentleman--polite, good manners, paid for everything (though I insisted on springing for dessert). We had a lovely walk through the city to my subway stop, and he insisted on waiting with me till my train came (due to some bizarre delay at the MTA, it ended up being a half-hour wait). He's certainly a wonderful catch--cute, (did I mention tall?), smart, independent. My only real qualms are about the suburb thing and his smoking habit (I find cigarette smoking a tad distasteful in a boyfriend). And he made lots of boyfriend noises, saying "we'll have to go here, we'll have to do this" and trying to schedule a 3rd date. Tall Ted, where were you 3 months ago, when I needed you so badly?

Though it's a tad early with Web Walter as well (our second date is scheduled for Saturday), he's been making similar boyfriend noises. So it appears that Pretty Polly may be forced to choose!

I love how funny life is. When you want/need a boyfriend so badly, no eligible candidates appear. But since I've decided that I shouldn't date for the next three months (I'll be appearing in 3 shows, so I honestly don't have time), not one but two eligible bachelors present themselves. Isn't that always the way?

In other news, Dolly apparently had a lovely date with MacB last night. But it appears that he has found both of our blogs (and my old one!) so I doubt she'll be posting much about it.

They always find the blogs. I'm just waiting for Web Walter or Tall Ted to drop the same bomb on me....

Blog Change

Okay, so I'm bored already with Tabula Rasa. Going on one of Awe's suggestions, I'm changing the name to Acting Blonde -- a much more fun title. And my old blog had great art, this one doesn't, so I'll have to fix that too. I'm on it!

From Dry Spell to ??

I don't have time right now to date. I want to make this clear. I'm starting rehearsals for three(!) shows today, in addition to working two jobs and a pretty full class load. I'd like to see my friends occasionally as well, so I've basically resolved not to date till my shows are over in July.

And so the universe has seen fit to throw two totally eligible guys my way. Where were they 3 months ago when I had time for such things?!?

Tall Ted seems totally smitten with me. He spent the weekend (he was out of town) sending adorable text messages, checking up on me. So sweet. Our date last week was a lot of fun, and date 2 is scheduled for tomorrow. Only minor concerns at this point: he wants to live in the suburbs and is not really creative. But we'll see.

And then there was my date this Saturday. Dolly has dubbed him "Web Walter." After a conversation with Jersey Shore Boy about eharmony, and simultaneously getting a discount coupon on my email, I sucked it up and joined. Not a lot of Potentials there, but Web Walter's profile intrigued me. He's a web designer/photographer/aspiring filmmaker (creative enough?), and he answered my initial screening questions correctly (They are: "How many books did you read last year", with the correct answer "more than 12" and "Where do you see yourself living in 15 years" answering "an apartment in the city").

So we met up. I found time to squeeze him in before a playwright's birthday party (and networking event for me). I apologized for the less than ideal time frame, but it was a first date anyways, so how long would it last? Eight hours, it turns out.

We met for dinner/drinks at a cute cafe in the Village. The conversation was easy, free flowing. And eating outside was a lovely treat after the long winter. After dinner, we agreed to take a walk, in the general direction of the bar where I had to meet Dolly. We ended up walking all 40 blocks there. Web Walter is pretty cute. Funny. And easy to talk to. Creative. Passionate. A lot of qualities I'm looking for. He's exactly my height, though, so I'm taller than him in heels. But if that's the only negative, I'm sure I could do a lot worse.

Looking in the Irish Pub, it looked empty, so I invited Web Walter to wait with me--but as we walked in, Dolly was sitting at the bar, and waved hello. I made introductions and the conversation was abruptly hijacked. The two of them chatted about obscure bands for the next half hour as if I wasn't there! But, hey, I'm glad they got along--Dolly tends to find most of my boys too "normal." As I nudged "We should go," Dolly blurted out "Are you coming to the party with us?" It seemed rude to not let him come at this point, so there we were. Not what I expected, but okay. His friends were meeting up with him around the corner, so I ended up arriving at the party with a full-on entourage of 4. Luckily no one seemed to mind.

MacB was at the party (long-time readers, remember him?). It was clear almost immediately that there was something between him and Dolly. As I mixed and mingled (Web Walter was very good about letting me do my own thing, he didn't seem to need babysitting at all). Though Web Walter and I stayed late (and did some seriously nice making out!), we were both ready to go while MacB and Dolly were still engrossed in each other's company. So we left them there, and said our goodbyes.

So now of course, I have a date tomorrow with a great guy that I get along with, but seem to really have a connection with Web Walter. What to do? If things go well with Web Walter, I'll have to say something to the Tall Ted.... Which is worse? "I met someone else," or "I don't feel a connection?"

Oh, and this morning when I got to work, I had an email from MacB. It read:

Polly--

As usual, it was great seeing you on Saturday night. Sorry we didn'tget to talk more, but I didn't want to cramp your date's style. Walter was his name, right? How did that all end up going, anyway?

I especially enjoyed meeting your friend, Dolly. She was...well, um...WOW! That's all I can say for the time being. She WOWed me. Otherwise, I'm rendered temporarily speechless. I definitely liked meeting her, though.

Hope you had a great Easter yesterday, and are enjoying a terrific day today. More later for you, my dear. ;)

~ MacB

Interesting....

The Gamekillers

Has anyone seen these ads plastered all over the city? The Gamekillers. Characters that kill your game.

Well someone needs to add PUA Logan to the list.

Sarah and I headed out to see a show last night, and decided to catch a few drinks afterwards. We ended up at our typical LES haunt, started chatting it up with two fellows at the bar. Directly next to them was a hopa-looking guy (I have a weekness for the hopa boys). Sarah knows this, and was like "Oooh, that one's for you!" I agreed.

Since Sarah was peacocking with a shirt that says: "All Guys Lie Except One", the Hopa boy turned to her and started chatting. "Crap," I thought, as he was very friendly and seemed into her. But they quickly involved me in the conversation and he began paying a lot of attention to me--and bought me a drink! We were having a great chat when PUA Logan showed up. As I greeted him hello, he said "Hey!! Is it true that (guy i slept with 3 years ago) has a J shaped dick?"

Now honestly, how is one to recover from this? I tried to laugh it off, but of course Hopa Boy was like "Really? Who was this? How did that work?" He wanted the full details. So now I come off as a total ho-bag--and my chances with him have been killed. After that our conversation didn't really go anywhere. I excused myself. Hopa boy asked for my number out of politeness, but I really don't think I'll be hearing from him.

You'd think a student of PUA tactics would know enough not to destroy someone else's game (it's not like he wanted to pick up the Hopa boy himself, right?), but I guess not.

Stupid gamekillers.

New Experiences with Tall Ted

Tall Ted and I had a date last night. It was fun--ended up having a blast. The details:

We met up in midtown and headed to a cute Turkish place. Cheap, great food. (For any of you guys out there that argue you don't pay for a date's dinner because you don't want to date a golddigger, follow this guy's lead: he paid, but the dinner set him back all of 40 bucks. And it was great. And if I were a golddigger, that would be enough to put me off. But I'm not.) But because it was so early, we decided not to call it a night just yet. He's a ballroom dancer, and I love to swing dance, so we ended up at my fav Country Western bar, and two-stepped and swing danced. I loooooooove dancing--and any guy who can lead is a total winner in my book.

At the Turkish place, the lady at the next table bought us a round of drinks (something new!). When Tall Ted went to the bathroom, I thanked her, and she began asking questions. "Where are you from?" "Where is he from?" "Is this your first time out together?" "He's shy, isn't he?" I answered all her questions politiely.

On the date, we kissed quite a bit. Not bad. Though it was strange--he's so much taller than I am that I actually got a crick in my neck while making out. This has never happened before. What a strange experience. And I was in heels too!

He's total BF Potential, but I am a bit nervous about one thing: he grew up in the suburbs--and wants to return there! I have no interest in ever living in the suburbs. I think I'd kill myself if I had to live there. This was why Jersey Shore Boy and I broke up--we couldn't figure out what to do--he didn't want to live in Manhattan, I can't live in Jersey. And Tall Ted says he wants to raise kids in the suburbs. Yuck. I wonder how much he means that? Because that's a deal breaker for me...

Weekend Update

Caught a great show this weekend. It's a walking tour/scavenger hunt/interactive play that takes place all over lower Manhattan. I totally loved it. The actors were great, the Mafioso plot was fun, and we even got refreshments along the way. If any of you have out-of-town guests, I highly recommend it, as it'll be fun for both you and them.

I ended up hanging out with some of the cast afterwards, and one of the actors (the most talented one!) asked for my number! What a week. First a cute Brit, then Tall Ted, and an actor? I've had a good week--and haven't even been trying.

Tall Ted called Sunday night. We have plans for a date this Wednesday. Hrm. Should be interesting. I wonder if he's as charming upon a second meeting?

Beyond the Bars....

Single life is a cycle. You're up, you're down, sometimes working a full on Rotation, sometimes wallowing in your loneliness. Since Dolly's a bit tired of dating, as am I (I love that we're totally on the same page), we've taken a break from the bar scene. But we're also not the stay-at-home-and-watch-Meg Ryan-movies type, so we've been filling the weeks with new activities. Fun, different things, like the Eye-Gazing party, bonding with some fabulous bloggers, planning to hit a bookclub on Tuesday. And, lest you think we're joined at the hip, we've been doing our own thing, too. But none of these events have been expressely about meeting men. Far from it.And yet I've had one of my most sucessful boy weeks in recent memory.

Huh?

In addition to the creepy musician's phone call (I still haven't called back--I'm swamped!) and the cute Brit at the concert, I had an adorable encounter last night.

Willow and I are both taller girls, and do have trouble meeting tall men. They're out there, but when doing speed dating, or a lock and key party, or basically any singles event, it seems that most of the guys are short. And at the bars too. So, she thought it would be best to go to the source. Yes, Willow and I decided to check out the Tall Club of NYC.

With Dolly in tow for moral support, we hit their monthly happy hour event last night. Though it took us a bit to warm up, we were soon chatting with all the other tall folks, and yes, there were tall boys there. One seemed quite smitten with me. We chatted a bit, about jobs, NYC, the troubles of being tall, and my upcoming role as a famous sex symbol. He wanted to grab a bite afterwards, but Dolly & Willow were committed to hitting up their favorite bar afterwards (and we got the coolest, most amazing, fun tall club member to come with us! She's a doll.) so I had to decline. Instead, though, he handed me his business card as we were leaving (I gave him my number too). Written on the back was his cell phone and this note: "BTW: You're 10x cuter than (famous sex symbol's initials)."

Can everyone collectively "awhhhhh" with me? Adorable.

More Brits.... and hangovers

Damn It Anyway and I went to see Leona Naess last night at the Bowery Ballroom. She was great, but didn't play anything I knew. But still it was fun. Why are all the great female singer/songwriters these days British? Just wondering...

If you're ever at the Bowery Ballroom, seriously, order the wine. They fill up these huge plastic cups, so really you're getting 2 glasses for the price of one! Yippee! I was smashed, and am still drunk/hungover. Not fun.

I was wearing my new skirt that makes me feel like Marilyn Monroe, so I wasn't surprised when, during the break between sets, a cute British boy started talking to me. Damn It Anyway wisely hung back (thanks!). The talk turned to what I'm looking for in a boyfriend--and he got my email. Damn It Anyway is sure he'll be in touch. I'm not, but hoping he will. A little short, though, but I'm still such a sucker for the accent. You'd think the British Scientist would have cured me, but no.

In other news, this summer theatre festival is presenting a great idea for a show--an ebay auction for the plot! Check it out!--I'd bid, if I had the $$....

The Independent Activity

I've been really unhappy with myself lately in acting class. All of my activities seem to suck. My teacher (or "Acting Guru" as a friend likes to say) doesn't like them, says "they're not well crafted." Ug. And I don't know what's worse: that there is no end to the activities in sight (one fellow had the gall to ask in class last week--and incurred Guru's wrath) or that, as Guru puts it, "this is the foundation for your character work next year. If you can't craft a good activity, you can't craft a character." Shit. This is not good, considering I've had all of 3 activities that worked well (note that all of these are imaginary circumstances):

--My mother had cancer. I was learning to play her favorite song on the guitar to play at visiting hours. Of course, I cried in class.
--My bestest, most amazing friend from high school was moving to NY. I was throwing her a "This is Your New Life" party (all activities should have a theme of some sort). I was so happy and excited. It was great.
--My best activity was (I think) when my niece had died and I was making a video photo collage to play at her funeral. That one made me and my scene partner cry, it was so sad.

I've had a lot of crappy activities too. Most of them are not terrible but "don't bring me to a full emotional life" as Guru would say. They included:
--Some guy had tricked me into sleeping with him (I actually used this blog post as inspiration). I was going to paper his work area with flyers and wear a sandwich board. Right idea, Guru said, wrong activity. I should have picked something more fulfilling--dressing up as something, doing something worse than just posters/flyers. And making a poster doesn't really bring you to a full emotional life...
--My Mom and step-dad couldn't go to Hawaii for their wedding anniversary because my step-dad had a stroke(!) so I was creating Hawaii for them in my apartment. I was trying to be happy, but my activity was actually quite sad. So my emotions got all confused and locked up. Crap.
--One of my friend's boyfriends had done something crappy to her. I had a whole convoluted story for what he did, and as a result she was mad at me, and yada yada. I was going to disguise myself and fool them both. But since my story was way too complicated, I couldn't act it. Ug!
--One of my friends had betrayed me, so I was dressing up as Mata Hari to embarrass her publicly. Good theme, but it turns out I didn't really care too much--her betrayal wasn't that big a deal, I guess, in the end.
--I had forgotten to go to my parent's wedding anniversary, because I'm an idiot. Shit! So I was trying to learn a song to sing to make it up to them. Not a great song, and I wasn't really connected to the activity.

Well I guess all this reflection paid off, since today wasn't so bad--I gave my dad Alzheimers and was recording memories for him. I cried. But my "contact" work with my scene partner wasn't so good. But he's so darn cute it's hard for me to yell at him! *sigh*

Hell

I feel like some days I want to post 15 times on here, and others not at all. Ah. The life of a blogger.

I saw the greatest show this weekend. Quite the opposite from the Jacques Brel disaster. It's called Hell, and is an operatic retelling of Dante's Inferno. Sounds terribly boring, right? But it's not. It's brilliant. It's all about the importance of live art. Live theatre, live poetry, live opera. And how it's still important, and still relevant in our society. And needs to be there. And how the powers that be (it's somewhat political) are crushing live arts, and feeding us pre-recorded images en masse. If you're in New York, and at all excited by opera, or theatre, or if you are a creative soul at all, you will love it. Go see it! Tickets are only $20. It only plays through this Sunday, though, so you've got to hurry!

Eye Gazing Too!

So, as Dolly said, Thursday we went to our first ever eye-gazing party. It was an interesting experience, to say the least.

After plying ourselves with excessive amounts of alcohol, we sat down and were forced to gaze into the eyes of ~12 strangers, for two minutes each. Great music played in the background, which made the process easier, but it was certainly uncomfortable, especially in the beginning. I, of course, had a perpetual case of the giggles and did a lot of smiling with my partners. Some men were okay with that--others were not. At one point, when Dolly and I started cracking up, the fellow I was gazing with snapped at me, saying "It's not going to work if you're laughing!" Well, sorry, buddy, for having a good time! The rest of our gazing didn't go so well after that.

It was strange how different looking to each person's eyes was. One guy was so adorably nervous, the whole time I was gazing at him I was sending him "Calm down, it's alright" vibes. Another guy had been doing this for a few months and was super into it--and seemed to love gazing into everyone's eyes. Another disturbed me with his nearly imperceptible (but still noticable) lip movements. I got the feeling he was thinking about doing not nice things to me--somewhat inappropriate! And of course there were the good experiences too, a few guys that I really liked gazing at.

I did have fun, but at the end of the gazing we moved into the "mingling" part of the party--and here's where I felt things didn't go as well as they could. Since the structure of the party was so similar to speed dating, I guess I expected a similar ending--you can talk to people if you want, but if that hot guy you connected with leaves early, you still have a chance to "match" with him. But there were no score cards, no matches, so it was really a free-for-all at the end--and the two guys I really liked were talking to other women, and I'm not really the aggressive type, so c'est la vie. Dolly ended up talking to a cute actor, so of course Willow and I chatted up his friend. He seemed all right--tall, a musician, very polite (during the eye-gazing he moved his head so the light wouldn't be shining in my face--what a gentleman!). Somehow he got me to call his phone so we could hear his ring tone--which, uh oh, means he has my number. He did give off a bit of a creepy vibe. Not too much, but a bit--which was strange, because the actor Dolly was talking to seemed sooooo normal.

Of course the musician just called. His message was so cute--he was so clearly nervous, stuttering a bit, didn't know what to say. I have such a weakness for utter lack of game, I don't know why. But his vibe was a little off. What to do? Should I call him back?