Things are better...
Things are going much better with Smitten. I saw him 3 times last week(!) and already saw him yesterday (he came to see my current show last night). Lots of down time – chilling out and cuddling and watching movies, a good break from our previous very formal dates. He even brought up V-Day – I was talking about how I wished I could see him in a suit (he was saying how swank his suit is) and he said that either the Saturday before V-Day or the Saturday after we’d have to dress up. “It’s not a weeknight thing,” he said. And I still get the impression we’ll spend V-Day together, but it’ll be probably low-key (which is fine by me, especially with a fancy thing on the weekend) so I don’t think he’s pulling the wool over my eyes. So that’s good. He also invited me to something on St. Paddys (which I unfortunately can’t do), but that’s 2 months away—a very good sign.
Yesterday was a little awkward—all my friends came and he was pretty quiet afterward, not his usual chipper self. But he did say he was feeling under-the-weather, so I’m not jumping to conclusions. He didn’t bring me flowers, though. *sigh* But oh well. I can’t get EVERYTHING I want.
I guess all my issues with him are really just internal. I can’t really relax and be myself around a guy until I know he is totally smitten with me. And Smitten isn’t super forthcoming about that stuff. Not like he has to be—we’ve only known each other 2 months. But it’s so much slower than any of my other relationships, I just can’t deal. I get nervous about every little thing, with little-to-no cause (like my current freak out about yesterday’s awkwardness. “Does he still like me? Will he break up with me now?” – Total ridiculousness). Thankfully, though, I’m pretty sure none of this is coming out with him. I’m just playing it cool—and we do have fun together, so that’s easy. Note to self: CHILL OUT!
Yesterday was a little awkward—all my friends came and he was pretty quiet afterward, not his usual chipper self. But he did say he was feeling under-the-weather, so I’m not jumping to conclusions. He didn’t bring me flowers, though. *sigh* But oh well. I can’t get EVERYTHING I want.
I guess all my issues with him are really just internal. I can’t really relax and be myself around a guy until I know he is totally smitten with me. And Smitten isn’t super forthcoming about that stuff. Not like he has to be—we’ve only known each other 2 months. But it’s so much slower than any of my other relationships, I just can’t deal. I get nervous about every little thing, with little-to-no cause (like my current freak out about yesterday’s awkwardness. “Does he still like me? Will he break up with me now?” – Total ridiculousness). Thankfully, though, I’m pretty sure none of this is coming out with him. I’m just playing it cool—and we do have fun together, so that’s easy. Note to self: CHILL OUT!
posted by Pretty Polly at 9:37 PM
3 Comments:
Ohh, this is adorable! I must confess, the last time that I read your 'blog, you were still with that "instant" fellow, so this is a somewhat surprising turn of events.
However, I think that there is something wonderfully delightful about wanting to take things slowly; too slow is almost always better than too fast.
You never know: he might turn up on St. Valentine's Day in a suit, take you out for the most fabulous dinner, and give you tickets for a delightful week-end away together :-)
Glad to hear that things are going well! :)
And, I sooo know what you mean about freaking out around guys. Completely normal! Or, at least, that's what I tell myself so that I don't feel like such a basketcase. :)
I need to remind myself to do that a lot.
Post a Comment
<< Home